1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good. except when covered in your three year old's vomit.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step. just look down first and make sure your not on a cliff or something
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. but it's long enough to pick a handful of people I think are absolute idiots...(per Earthmama)
4. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does. What?!
5. Pay off your credit cards every month. Or max them out right before you declare bankruptcy.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.To their face anyway.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone. but I heartily recommend getting drunk together first so that no one remembers you cried...(per Earthmama)
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it. Of course he can take it- he's got voicemail.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck. Unless you plan on marrying a rich old man and disinheriting his children.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile. Seriously.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't mess up the present. Or get even... that's always good.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry. Especially, if plain old Catholic guilt doesn't work.
13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their Journey is all about. unless of course you see them on the cover of the Globe--everyone knows that stuff is legit.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it. spoken like a person in some sort of unusually healthy relationship.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. or with money...
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind. or hold you breath until you get your way.
17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful. Yeah make sure you pack it up and give it to your sibling so they can figure it out, too. 18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger. or bitter...
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else. only make sure your ass fits on the slide...getting stuck ain't pretty...
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer. yeah stalk your quarry if you have to and have a rock solid alibi if you get caught..
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special. don't forget the cheesecake and fried chicken, and cheap wine
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow. or look into the appropriate psychotropic drugs..
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple. except for in a hair color...even in old age that looks pretty stupid...
24. No one is in charge of your happiness except you. I'm pretty sure the IRS would beg to differ...
25. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: "In five years, will this matter?" Unless of course you are a perpetually bitter, vindictive human being in which case all this will still be quite fresh...
26. Always choose life. Yep drag it out into an open field and beat it into submission.
27. Forgive everyone everything. but only after you have made them feel guilty first.
28. What other people think of you is none of your business. damn and I've been perfecting the art of fishing for compliments and everything...when did this rule get made up?
29. Time heals almost everything. Give time time. this usually comes from someone who isn't waiting with you.
30. However good or bad a situation is, it will change. one usually wants to smack the sunny, upbeat person who tries to tell you this when your life is in the toilet.
31. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will.Stay in touch. Or buy them lots of presents.
32. Believe in miracles. or count on what comes around going around...
33. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do. well damn now you tell me...
34. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now. can I use this in court?
35. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young. this one I can't make fun of...
36. Your children get only one childhood. Make it memorable. you sure as hell better or they'll blame you for everything...
37. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved. damn another I can't mess with...
38. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere. and think of the tan you'll get...
39. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back. hell yeah...people could hold that crap over your head for years.
40. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need. I mostly believe this except when I am at the Galleria...
41. The best is yet to come. can I get this one notarized by someone in charge?
42. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up. Definitely. You'll make at least one person jealous...
43. Yield. or get yourself REALLY good airbags
44. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift. okay so that was three out of 44 I don't have the heart to touch...