Got hammered with a bug this week missed posting, but wanted to get this down for posterity.

Oh and literary credit to 1st Sgt Mike Burke for the title. I totally forgot about that childhood chant...funny aside is it's exactly what my husband said when I told him what had happened. So I'm not sure if the twisted mind is a function of the Corps or the Y chromosome...


Took the kids to eat last night.

I think I'm coming down with whatever Tony had so wasn't up to cooking.

Seems someone at school taught Matthew the word diarrhea.

Matthew *likes* saying this new word.

Jake:
Mom, I need to go to the bathroom.

Mom:
Go ahead.

Matthew:
(As Jake is walking away from the table-)
Hey Jake! JAKE!!!
You got the diaRRHEaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa????!!!!
(turning to mom knowingly)

MOM...Jake got the diaRRHEaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.

Mom from under the table:
Shhh Matthew...NO he doesn't have that.

Matthew adjusting decibel level to eardrum bleeding:
Have what?
The diaRRHEaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa?!

Mom in low mortified Mom hiss:
MATTHEW
Knock it off, boy!!!

Matthew:
(solemnly nodding in a whisper)
I think I have the diaRRHEaaaaaaaaaaaa.

Get home
before Mom goes into the house from the car,
Mom starts raking the lawn of debris that got left
(it was killing the grass where it sat waiting for pickup
it was one of those 'I don't care if I'm in heels I have GOT to get to this' things.)
Ten minutes later look up and Matthew is standing in the frontdoorway...Yelling at the top of his lungs

Mom!!
MOM!!!
MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!

Smugly jabbing a finger down at his drawers and what is running down his leg.

I TOLD you I had the diaRRHEA!!!

I suppose there was a reason he learned the word
and I am further going to guess it was from a classmate who sits in close proximity.

All trials are heaped on the mother.

10 comments:

Annie T said...

Always listen to your child when he learns a big word. There is a reason for them learning syphillis; intercourse; condom and...diarrhoea.

Valuable lesson learned there, Hope!

justhay said...

Eww. I didn't feel like breakfast anyway. So sorry, here is hoping for a diarrhea free week!

Anonymous said...

Kids are funny... Once, when my kids was younger I think it was my youngest that run out from the bathroom shouting "Dad, I have flat poo!

Southern Sage said...

I always stand up in a fast food place and say "you gotta poop" real loud.
the kids love that!

Chunks of Reality said...

LOL Annie!!

Mighty Morgan said...

My only experience thus far with the wonderful world of poop, farts and all that lies between has been through my nieces and nephews...but I'm sure i will be finding out soon enough! As for you i hope you feel better!

Chunks of Reality said...

Just checking in to make sure you are alright my dear.

*hugs*

Linda and her Twaddle said...

Hope you is okay Ms Hope.

~J said...

Hope...it's time to write again. Roller Dude is even keeping his stories up and working OVERtime...come on now...we miss you. Log on somewhere...

Rolando said...

haha thanks for the visual Hope! Get better soon!

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