Showing posts with label Matthew. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Matthew. Show all posts

Awesome

on 06 November 2008

Upon discussing my son Matthew's foray with dad to the Halloween carnival, I was regaled with tales related to all manner of fawning, spoiling and petting of my youngest offspring by teachers and student body of the girl persuasion...seems my little guy is quite the big man on campus.


After getting this report from dad, I turn to my son and ask him what all mommies ask their kid after they have already heard the damn story,

I ask for four year old verification...


"Uh huh," says he.


"How did you get all that candy and those prizes, Matthew?"

Without skipping a beat,
he turns to me with a shrug
and one of those
I'll speak slow and use short sentences so you can understand expressions and says,

"Yeaaaaah, (sigh-- eyebrows up, rueful smile)

It's 'cause I'm awesome , mom."


I wonder if a lack of a self image problem at four bodes well or not?

Helping mom with mail to some Marines day before yesterday.

Got hammered with a bug this week missed posting, but wanted to get this down for posterity.

Oh and literary credit to 1st Sgt Mike Burke for the title. I totally forgot about that childhood chant...funny aside is it's exactly what my husband said when I told him what had happened. So I'm not sure if the twisted mind is a function of the Corps or the Y chromosome...


Took the kids to eat last night.

I think I'm coming down with whatever Tony had so wasn't up to cooking.

Seems someone at school taught Matthew the word diarrhea.

Matthew *likes* saying this new word.

Jake:
Mom, I need to go to the bathroom.

Mom:
Go ahead.

Matthew:
(As Jake is walking away from the table-)
Hey Jake! JAKE!!!
You got the diaRRHEaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa????!!!!
(turning to mom knowingly)

MOM...Jake got the diaRRHEaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.

Mom from under the table:
Shhh Matthew...NO he doesn't have that.

Matthew adjusting decibel level to eardrum bleeding:
Have what?
The diaRRHEaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa?!

Mom in low mortified Mom hiss:
MATTHEW
Knock it off, boy!!!

Matthew:
(solemnly nodding in a whisper)
I think I have the diaRRHEaaaaaaaaaaaa.

Get home
before Mom goes into the house from the car,
Mom starts raking the lawn of debris that got left
(it was killing the grass where it sat waiting for pickup
it was one of those 'I don't care if I'm in heels I have GOT to get to this' things.)
Ten minutes later look up and Matthew is standing in the frontdoorway...Yelling at the top of his lungs

Mom!!
MOM!!!
MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!

Smugly jabbing a finger down at his drawers and what is running down his leg.

I TOLD you I had the diaRRHEA!!!

I suppose there was a reason he learned the word
and I am further going to guess it was from a classmate who sits in close proximity.

All trials are heaped on the mother.

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