If you come and read comments any, you'll see a very kind one from one of my blog friends today. Actually, I guess that doesn't narrow it down much for I have made many good friends in the blogosphere--if my definition for friend is in fact accurate--well it is for me and that is what matters, yes?

On the other hand, there are a few who I don't remember as fondly, like the humanfare you find in real life, some are liars or manipulators-- some just want to live vicariously, but by and large, I feel the nature of this environment can as easily enhance the positive qualities in people as the negative. As in real life, behavior in the end is an act of the will. Semi-anonymity enhances candor and self expression unbridled by self imposed pride, consciousness, propriety or percieved correctness. Blogging is a living thing, a new blogger I know said that and it resonated. Living things are not static nor are they of one stuff.

Recently, I had a dear friend ask me, what and who were some of you on my blog. What brought them to me or me to them? They were pretty perplexed. I even went so far as to make a list...a Who's Who for Hope's Radio, if you will and a Who's Why, if I were to get more specific. I got far more out of it than they would as it turns out.

True my blog choices are pretty diverse. The reasons for that are many.

Honestly, I hadn't planned on posting, yet. I have a blog changeover to do, but the loss of a stalwart friend without the selfish benefit of a goodbye on my part compells me to spill my thoughts now. Partially, I am sated by this. For in a way the spilling of thought has been staunched of late and replaced by rants, innuendo or insinuation whether conciously or unconsciously--which is an entirely different post.

My friend's departure reminds me there is great value in blogging for if there wasn't, I wouldn't feel a profound loss in not being able to say goodbye. Blogging though virtual is still concrete in thought. You are deliberate in what you post and in what you choose to divulge and to a certain extent to whom you divulge it.

I think the first thing I'll do is get all left brained and answer some questions I found over at another blog. I'm not interested in too much chest heaving, sucking chest wound emotionality today. And truth be told, I have never been know for a conciseness of speech unless I am very angry or wounded in some way. In those cases concise speech is the kindest thing one might say of me. Still I feel like it's time to take a survey as much for myself as for those readers who have been around a while or for a short time.

See? I digress already.

1. How did you come up with your blog title OR what does it mean?
Ann LaMott, an author called all the You suck, you'll never be good enough, what the hell is a matter with you?! I mean really? voice in your head, KFUK radio...I totally get that. Like I'm pretty sure I have subwoofers in my head 'cause the bass in there can rattle my teeth sometimes. The most annoying part of that is I don't even get to mutter, "damn kids!"

2. What are your general goals for blogging?
Initially, after my car accident in 2006 it was just to vent. I WAS PISSED. So pissed it scared me-- so I stopped...but I came back to it. I have always been a writer. It's therapy. It's narcisstic. **sigh**. It is what it is.

3. Do people “in your real life” know that you blog and do they comment on your blog OR is it largely anonymous? When I first found out about blogging three years ago, a friend heard me questioning what it was and I remember her exact words and intrigued expression, "OH! Hope, if you EVER decide to blog you HAVE to tell me!" I didnt' know this mama very well at the time, but we ran in the same circles, she was a member of the homeschool group I founded. Her enthusiastic response was pleasing, but, like any self respecting neurotic, after I filed her reaction under C for compliment, I headed straight to the W's as in:"WTF did she mean by THAT?" and filed it there, too. But yes, some who know me IRL do post, some bloggers I have met once or twice and some I feel I have know for two or three lifetimes and have never laid eyes on.

4. How often do you post (x per week)? How often do you read other blogs (x per week)? I usually post everyday, but not posting is usually a baromerter of some sort of mental constipation...meh...Sometimes I post more than once a day...**thinking to self** well, that makes sense, I have been accused of the inverse malady as well. I usually read my blogs everyday.

5. How do you select blogs to read (do you prefer blogs that focus on certain topics or do you choose by tone or…?) It's usually not topic, it's writing style, or voice. It's level of candor. For instance, I'm not too crazy about diary blogs, but then if there's a mama who just lays it on out there about where she is and it's in the context of Cheerios and trips to the grocery store...well so be it. I read the astronomy, cop, Marine, soldier, sex, tech, academic, family, faith, spiritual,art, writing, curmudgeon, morbidly intense,I'm floating in the ocean for 1000 day blogs...Really no rhyme or reason topic wise.


6. Do you have any plans to copy your blog entries in any other format, or do you think that one day, you’ll just delete it all?I always feel Ike a hypocrite for riding Mike's ass about writing when I haven't done so much myself...still I think some people who blog really should write books or take it to larger platforms for expression...and no, I'd never delete...I might move my prose maybe.

7. What are the things you like best about blogging? Insight, plain and simple. Mine and others. Sought, offered and stumbled upon.

8. What are the things you don’t like about blogging?
Nothing really. Trolls, getting stuck in my head, trying to balance it with real life duties...they are all parts of what blogging is about. I accept them all. Notice I didn't' say I LIKE them all of the time or even once in a while.

9. How do you handle comments? I do what my friend Sage said once: if someone takes the time to read much less comment you should try to do the same.

10. Do you have any burning thoughts to share on blog etiquette?Not one damn thing...'cause somewhere out there I'm sure someone sees me as peeing in the proverbial blogging sink myself. Yeah, I don't even have the proper equipment to pull that off gracefully...still I like the imagery.

11. Any desired blog features? No...not really. I don't want to control everything...though you'd hardly guess that sometimes, eh?

12. Have you suffered blog addiction?I am an addictive personality by nature. Luckily, I have managed to avoid most chemicals and habits save occasional alcohol and--well let's just leave it at alcohol shall we? I think overall I try to balance as best I can.

So there it is. I'll miss you, too Fumanchu Dad. You gave some great advice and a nice ear for a long while. I'm changing this blog over myself. I have wondered about balance and for what and whom I write. I suppose your departure somehow impressed upon me a need to bring everyone including myself up to speed.

Hope Radio will focus on military blogging and my family. I have friends I no longer see save here on my analytics page and I assume, if they still lurk they'll want to know how things are. I'm glad. I have family who knows enough about me without any additional ammunition being necessary. *grin* 'Sides they get me live and in living color...bless their pointy little heads.

I still want to write all sorts of things, but I'm not comfortable doing that here for the same reasons ironically, enough. Why? I don't know--lots of reasons, and I'm sure these reasons will continue to change so I'll save myself from the temtpation of over analyzation. (Don't say I never gave you people anything. This takes at least 6 column inches off this long ass post already. You're welcome.)

So instead I'll still hope to use this platform to help my peeps in the Sandbox and keep everyone I love and care about in or out of my present life in the general loop.

I don't know much about what else I'm doing right now, having had to switch gears so much in career and mindset this last couple of months. But I do know I need to be busy and I need to keep writing, so this seems like the best avenue to take unless you have heard otherwise. ;0)

**yes, I editted about 4:30 CST.