I've reached critical mass on the homefront.

Kids are on some kind of parent hating crack.

Insurance company is about to bend me over the couch on a claim. Fine. It's insurance I won't rank on that. But I will insist on picking the guy, and demand he bring me flowers and buy me dinner first. Damn it.

I have GOT to get back in the gym. I've been slacking in the worst way. A good pounding is in order. Physical, I mean. State Farm is taking care of the rest.

I could give one hairy rat's tookus what Michelle Obama's favorite food is. How does Pakistan and nuclear security, Holbrooke's testimony or the Taliban spokesperson, Zabiullah Mujahid's, interview this morning rate following that kind of noise on CNN? I don't think I will ever wrap my mind around the fact that we as a people are such sheep, news directors can pull this crap. WHO CARES? If you felt just as dirty watching that, go look at one of these blogs and bring yourself up to speed-- maybe save a few brain cells. Registan.net Ghosts of Alexander Or check out the link at the top of the middle column called War on Terror News. Go ahead. I dare you.

Okay.

**Deep breath**

In an interest of regaining a semblance of composure and giving this post some sort of legitimacy, let me end it in a different tone. Whining, pissing and moaning will only take me so far. (Granted, the drink at lunch will have helped with my attitudinal re-direction.)

I need some sheets for twin beds. Three sets actually. Four, if I can get them. Laundry service in the Sandbox is pretty tough on fabric and sleeping on rough is not so fun, especially when you've worked in rough all day. Any kind of super hero type sheet and or comforter sets would put some big grins on a few jarheads faces I know. If you don't want to send and just feel like throwing money at me, that would be completely cool, too.

I can also use macadamia nuts, a protein called Monster Milk (look for link in middle column) some Amazon gift cards, coffee beans and good socks and undies (no, not for me. gheesh.)

Let's fix it so someone can have a good day OKAY? ok.

Oh yeah, before I forget.

Travis and Gman, here's your present.

Stark and Noelle and the discussion of the Burke pedagological effect on offspring called to mind a recent video from America's 1st Sgt sent to my offspring in reply to a video said offspring sent to him in Oahu a week ago.

The kids' video, which I inadveratantly deleted-damn- has all four kids lined up like a scene out of the Sound of Music saying hello to Burke.

It went something like this:

Kids: (dressed for bed and waving madly)Hi Buhk!! Hiiiiii!!!

Dad: (former Marine Sgt.): Hey that's 1st Sgt!! How many times do I have to tell you?

Kids: (nonplussed by paternal dressing down, giddy with the general just before bed high and further spun up with the novelty of sending a video.)

***sing songy**Hiiiiii! 1st Sgt.! Hi. We love you!! Hey whatcha doing?Then, Matthew, my littlest guy, breaks rank and gets nose and cheek deep into the camera phone, grinning like a loon and says..."Hiiiii Uuuuuuuuuncle Mike!!" before covering his mouth with his hands, falling out onto the couch in four year old convulsions and laughing like that was the funniest thing he had ever said.

After few minutes, my cell phone sounds and they get this from "Uncle Mike" All I can say is the children have memorized every line and gesture. I first realized this the next morning when I walked past the dining table and all of them are gnawing on whole pieces of sausage speared onto their fork at breakfast. I briefly paused, stretched my neck out to one side and then moved on through the room, lip bloody from biting it.

***eyeroll***There is no escape from this person...

So. In an effort to illustrate Marine speak, this is our first translation lesson. Here 1st Sgt is saying, "Awww love you all, too, sweethearts. Be good!!! Talk to you soon..."

It's seemed kinda vague, lately. A long lately...kinda untethered if

you will.

I know it is showing up on my posts, too.

It's a good thing it's my freaking blog so the only one busting my ass about it is me...well...maybe that's the bad thing...dunno.

so

Update

Crossfit

Still loving this program.

Monday, Wednesday, Friday....always three high points of my week.

You sweat, get scuffed up and loose your lunchs ometimes...well...I loose my lunch--that's just me. Maybe I'm exorcising demons or something-- who the hell knows?

Shaun picked up his brown belt this night.

Milsupport

Several of my milfolks are coming home.

Shaun and his shop are headed back to North Carolina.

Jesse, near Fallujah only has a little while as well...he and his bride are planning a nice long vacation.

Some of my Afghanistan folks were wounded, but at this writing should be home or getting on helicopters to go to Bagram Airbase from their little private corner of hell in the Korengal Valley. They lost a lot of men on this deployment...nine just two weeks before they were due home, fourteen injured.

We joined the Y.

I can't drive to Houston everyday to get to the Crossfit gym so I thought on non Crossfit days I'd see what kind of mess I could get myself into there...we don't' have to pay much at all since the Y is sliding scale. whew. That pool is turning into a momma sanity preserver.

Anniversary

My 16th anniversary came and went.

I forgot until about thirty minutes before Tony came home and he bought a card that he kept forgetting to give me until he came home. We had an offer of babysitting and a night out with friends, but the man wasn't feeling it so I went out without him. It was a weird night.

Though then and since then I and one friend, Lisa, have discovered some good places for live music and so it wasn't all for naught.

Salads

I have become the master salad maker...this one is turkey, endive, spinach, avocado with balsamic and organic tomatoes...Yesterday was a chicken with walnuts, green apples, avocado and lime juice. Yum.I could go on, but well who cares that much about hearing about salads right? grin.

Okay, I've blathered on enough. Hope everyone is doing okay.

I caught my 3 year old peeing into a sandwich bag out on the back porch.You heard me. P_E_E_I_N_G. Uhhh...no I didn't get a picture of that, but I'm sure the old hag in the corner lot did. I expect CPS any day.

My son Jacob has the attention span of a gnat. I know I look at him and give direction or ask a question and while he looks like he is with me....THE BOY AIN'T WITH ME. Arggggggghhhh. I feel nuts.

I worked out too hard and waaaaay wrong yesterday and so when I went to Crossfit today, (naturally there is no traffic so I get there nice and early) I got to watch with great detail all the brutality they had planned for the class about to start. I stretched, making sure I put no mental blood in the water...yup that's me cooooool as a cucumber...inside I am creating trajectories for where I can work out in the gym which will give the most expeditious access to the back door and or the toilet and making a mental note to get before and after shots of my knees. They stay in various stages of f-d up. CF was as brutal as I expected. 'Course my degree of Wienerness makes it so. At one point I think I saw a bright light and one of my dead relatives.

Second in Command Boss Lady at the post office was nasty to the clerk trying to help me. I asked SCBL nicely...yes, I was NICE-- to back up and cut the clerk some slack. I wasn't in a hurry, no one was hurt, I didn't mind and since I am the customer neither should she--she pointed out that folks were waiting to which I responded let's just get it right for those 20 odd Marines and soldiers who are waiting for another letter and probably not in air-conditioning. It really was alright I told her. I can't wait to talk to the clerk later...I thought she was going to pee herself.

I took the kids to get haircuts. We are at the This Is My Life How Come You Pick My Haircut stage. We are also at the Because I Said So Stage.



My jarheads in Africa sent me some cool tshirts to PT in and a card which their all the guys in the shop signed. I was floored...I'm usually on the other end of MAIL. Thanks boys I've already broken in one of them. See?Glad you had fun at Go Karts. You boys finally got a night off! Thanks for the pics. L to R is Jean, Joe and Shaun.
Tony bought some perfume for me and left it on my computer chair for no reason at all. I think the last time he did that we were dating. Cool eh? It smells nice, too.


I am still trying to shop for clothes. The thing is I don't want to shop too much...I dunno where I'm going to level off and well...OK OK OK!!! I hate shopping HATE IT...I go into those department stores and my eyes glaze over and when they aren't glazed over I am pretty sure most of the stuff I get a look at I wouldn't' wear anyway especially for the price. I could send mail for a month for what they want for some of this stuff...ack. And what is with all these crazy patterns, shirt dresses and 70's crap? I'm only pissing and moaning because we have to go see the relatives this weekend and I keep putting off finding a dress which means shoes, and whatever else. Men have it so much easier...lucky dogs.

Like Hippy I am not ready to say much else...yeah like this post was soooo succinct, but suffice to say, my sleep sucks. I think it has to do with perspective myopia, insecurities and having to learn all new things lately. It's not that I don't' actually like all the new things...I'm just whiney about the fallout. It's a draining business. Incidentally, I am pretty much good with being in other people's business I just never figure out my own what with the whole myopic thing.